Simple Joys of Childhood

Watching the trash man pick up the trash.

Golf Cart

As you probably already know, Cooper is obsessed with golf. A lady in our ward saw this and thought that Cooper had to have it. Chris and I weren't sure he would know what it was, but sure enough, he did. He was saying "golf cart" and trying to hook his golf clubs to the back. It also came with a golf hat and little wire baskets with balls. He is in heaven. His face says it all.

Baby's Room is Done!

We've finally finished the baby's room! I love how it turned out. It's simple and clean. We plan to put our new family pictures in the empty picture frames. I also had Cooper create a picture to frame for the baby's room. I love how it turned out. He did such a great job! Less than a week and this little guy will be here! He won't be able to use his room for quite a while, but I'm happy knowing it is done and ready for him when he does come home.

Maternity Photos

As I mentioned in my last post, I had a bit of a meltdown when I looked at my belly in the mirror a week ago. There was no suppressing the tears. I saw it and realized, it could be my last bump. The two things I love most about being pregnant are my growing belly (even if it is uncomfortable) and feeling the baby move. Both of these things will be gone in less than a week and I may never experience them again. It's really hard to be 26 and to think I could be done having kids. I pray the Lord has one more for us, but we will be happy with whatever His plan is.

A sweet friend of mine reached out to an INCREDIBLE local photographer, Marissa Vargason Photography. Her work is amazing and I feel so blessed to have such wonderful friends. I was hoping for a few quick pictures of me and my bump and ended up having an experience I can't fully put into words. She recorded me and Chris saying things to the baby, got some video of Cooper being Cooper and us interacting with him, and Chris and I talking about our experience with coming up with a name. And of course, she got photos of me and my bump and us as a family. It was a wonderful experience. I can't wait to see and share the images. We're truly blessed.

35 Weeks!

I look awful and feel huge, but have to share this milestone... 35 weeks!!! It is hard not knowing if this kiddo will be our last or not because my body just doesn't seem to handle pregnancy well, though we hope the Lord has at least one more for us. I am trying to enjoy this big old bump these last few days. Feeling so blessed to be able to carry children, for eternal families, for modern medicine that will hopefully prolong our little guys life for many years, for family and friends, and so much more. Life is good. Hard, but so so good.

A Bit of a Scare

A week ago our little guy decided to try to make his appearance in the world. I'm incredibly grateful that they were able to stop contractions, but they have now moved my delivery date up to October 2 so less than two weeks until we meet this little guy! Though I wish he could stay in there longer and grow, I'm grateful I've been able to carry him this long.

So, what happened? Sunday evening I started getting back pain. I had had back pain here and there the previous week, but a heating pad always did the trick. Today, it didn't. It continued to get worse. Then, I was having really sharp back pains along with the constant back pain. I decided to start writing down when the sharp back pain hit and sure enough, every 6-8 minutes. Even though it was only in my back, I knew I had to be contracting. Off to McKay Dee Hospital we went. My contractions weren't registering so the nurse stayed in with me and felt my belly when I had the pain, sure enough, contractions. As I was there, things got worse. At one point I threw up. That was awful! Poor Chris, I sat up and it came so fast I couldn't say anything and made a big mess. Chris was there trying to help me the best he could. I could tell he was struggling not to cry because of the amount of pain he saw me in and probably because of the fear of this little guy coming early. I have so much respect for him.

Doctors were concerned about my previous c-section and for my safety decided to life flight me down to University Hospital. I need to deliver there so the baby can go straight to Primary Children's after. They felt they could safely get me there. Just before life flight came, Chris and a doctor gave me a blessing. I can't remember what was said, but how grateful I was in that moment that Chris was worthy to hold the priesthood. It brought me much comfort. Life flight team arrived and started to prep me for flight. I almost passed out when they put my IV in. The first didn't work, but thankfully the second one they tried did. The whole time I was telling Chris to take pictures. I have to document! I was really nervous about the flight, but it was a beautiful night. I didn't know we were landing until we hit the pad. It was very smooth. I'd rather not do that again though!

They prepped me a bit for an emergency c-section when I arrived, but they checked me and I was only at an almost 3 and my contractions had significantly slowed (possibly because of the medicine they gave me to hopefully do that). My mom and brother were there waiting for me already and then Chris arrived not long after. He had to drive from McKay to the U. They monitored me in Labor & Delivery till 6:30 the next morning and then felt they could send me to another area where I didn't have to be on all the monitors, but they check me regularly. We thought we would be going home that night, but were told baby wasn't passing his Non-Stress Tests. He scored a 6/10 on his NST/BPP test. They let me go home the next evening, insisting to me that baby was ok, but I had to go to the doctor the next day for another NST/BPP. He passed! We were told he probably wasn't passing because of the steroid shots they gave me while in the hospital. Huge relief! It meant not having to deliver him even earlier!

So, this week I've taken it easy. We've moved the TV upstairs to limit the amount of stairs I have to climb. I'm trying to get the rest of the stuff I needed to done before baby comes and now need to repack our hospital bags. It was a good practice, but I'm glad it's over! Praying this little guy will now stay in until Oct. 2. It occurred to me this morning that I don't have much longer with my baby bump and I lost it because it could be my last. It's really hard to take that in. I just don't know if my emotions and body can handle another pregnancy and that makes me sad. My pregnancies have never been normal and not being able to have as many kids as we would have liked is hard to swallow. We will see how me feel years down the road and will decide then if we feel Heavenly Father has more children in store for us. It's just hard not knowing and knowing that this could be the last. I never thought having kids would be such a traumatic experience for me and my body, but it is what it is. For some reason, my body just doesn't handle it well. I try to remind myself daily how lucky I am to even be able to have children.

So, here's to 35 weeks and counting! And to meeting our handsome little man in less than two weeks!

Go Wildcats!

Cooper was excited all day to go to the Weber State game. He brought me his "Wildcat Shirt" and shoes as soon as he woke up from his nap and we still have two hours before we left. He was a little hesitant at first, taking in the noise and crowd. He warmed up though and kept cheering. The people behind us were for the other team and kept saying "I love this guy!" because he could cheer anytime something happened, it didn't matter what team.

Our Little Man

I haven't updated on Cooper in a while. He is ALL boy!

• He hates clothes. He is quick to take off his clothes when you've got your back turned and next thing you know he is running around naked. 
• He hates to wear shoes.
• He LOVES cucumbers. Then again, he likes a lot of vegetables. We've found he isn't a huge meat eater, but loves the fruits and veggies.
• He has started to take an interest in soccer, but golf is still his favorite.
• He loves to be outside and loves to play in the dirt.
• He goes to bed with a book and a flashlight.
• We've found he takes great naps as long as they are in his bed. He's like his momma!
• He loves letters and numbers. He will sing parts of the ABC song with me. He can already say L-Z by himself!
• He loves things with wheels--- especially trains and cars.
• He calls a fort or anything you can get inside like a fort a castle.
• He is talking really well. He says things that shock me sometimes. He answers questions well, too. He's just a super smart kid!

Third Fetal Heart Ultrasound

We went to our third fetal echo today and last until this little one arrives. I always get nervous before these appointments, but it went so well. I'm glad it's over, but I'm also glad for the news we received while there. Baby Boy has no other issues other than the HLHS. That is wonderful news! He has a slight tricuspid valve leak, but it's so small it's not even a concern. The doctor said everyone has a slight leak.

We had him explain the first surgery for us in detail so we felt we understood it better. He will be having the "Norwood with Sono" open-heart surgery sometime within the first week. He thinks he will do well. We know it's in the Lord's hands, but it was great to hear that from a doctor that deals with these things a lot. He also told us to not freak out every time the monitors went off, especially within the first 24-48 hours. He said to watch day by day. Watch to see if things are slowly disappearing off of him--- medicines, drainage tubes, etc. If something increases, that is when we need to worry and ask more questions. I had a lot of questions and he was great to answer them.

I'm so proud of our little boy. He's gonna be a fighter like his brother. I'm getting very excited to see him. I wonder what he looks like and how he will look the same or different than Cooper. Only a few more weeks!

31 Weeks and Counting!

To be honest, I can't believe I've made it this far. Doctor says if my body continues to do this well, we're going to shoot for 37 weeks. That's not to say that I am extremely uncomfortable and every little pain freaks me out and that I'm having normal pregnancy symptoms, but my cervix looks good, which makes us all very happy. Baby is also growing and developing well.

• Felt my first braxton hicks contractions over the past couple of weeks. Both occurred at night. Woke me up with my stomach hard as a rock and me unable to move until it relaxed. Other than those two times, I don't believe I've had others. 
• I love feeling the baby move! I can feel it all over!
• Sciatic nerve pain has been horrible some days and nights, but overall pretty good.
• Mom & Eileen threw us a baby shower to get some things week need like gas cards, food cards, cash, etc. since we will be traveling to the hospital a lot. The shower went great. It was a huge blessing to us.
• Curtains are now hung in the baby's room. Just some decorating left to do--- hang artwork and a mobile. Get and put together the new dresser.
• Cooper is getting more and more excited for "baby bruder" also known as "Jellybean." It's adorable when he says it!
• Had my first non-stress test and baby did well. His heart rate was good and I didn't have any contractions. I will be doing these weekly.
• Clothes that fit are practically non-existent. I live in sweats/stretchy things and even those are uncomfortable.
• Started having charly horses when waking up in the morning. Talk about painful!
• Still loving Sonic ice water--- love eating the ice! Constantly eating! Only gained 16 pounds so far though!
• Seemed to have gotten some energy back--- I've been cooking every day and keeping up with the house.

Love these guys!

I couldn't resist a picture of these three playing basketball together. Three men I love.

Naptime Cuddles

Who needs a teddy bear when you can cuddle with a golf club for nap time?

What do you want to watch?

We get home from church and this conversation took place.

Chris: Do you want to watch a movie or golf?
Cooper: Golf!

Ogden LDS Temple Open House

I keep trying to write this blog post and can't quite get it worded the way I want. To say temples are important to us and our religion seems like an understatement. We believe in eternal families and that means more to me now than it ever has. With our little one on the way, we don't know how long he will be on this earth with us, but because Chris and I were sealed in the temple for time and all eternity, instead of until death do us part, by the power of the holy priesthood, we know that our family is forever. Having this knowledge means so much to us. Being able to walk through the temple today with my mom, brother, and Cooper made it that much more special. They are all people who mean so much to Chris and I. I feel blessed to know that we will be a family forever. We will see each other again after this life. What a wonderful Heavenly Father to bless us with something so sacred, special, and meaningful. The Ogden Temple is GORGEOUS inside and out. I look forward to participate in ordinances for those who have past when it opens to give them the chance of making their family eternal.

Mom & Son Time

Cooper and I stayed home while Chris went and enjoyed some time with his family during cousins camp. We had probably a little too much fun. We drank out of the same cup, with different straws, and Cooper thought that was the coolest thing. Then we watched a movie and had cookies. It was fun mommy and son time.

Naked Bum

This little guy kept taking his diaper off this morning. I don't know why, but he kept doing it over and over again. I was editing a photo shoot and I think he may have wanted my attention. I couldn't resist the photo op.

Daddy's Birthday

We celebrated Daddy's birthday with yummy ice cream from Coldstone. Cooper LOVED it! He is definitely a daddy's boy and a lot like his daddy. I am so glad they have such a great bond annnnnddd a little jealous. I love my boys!

My Little Batman

If you didn't already know, being Batman is exhausting. No worries though, a nap and he'll be fully of crime-fighting energy again!

Quotes That Are Helping Me Through This Trial

{President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, All is Well}
"In our time—when so much of what we desire is so easily within our reach—it is tempting to turn aside or give up whenever the road ahead seems a little bumpy or when the slope tends to rise so steeply before us. In those moments, it might inspire us to reflect on those men, women, and children who did not allow sickness, hardship, pain, and even death to deter them from their chosen path.... The pioneers knew that the things around them did not determine their happiness, but the things within most certainly did. And with that spirit they found happiness in every circumstance and in every trial—even in those trials that reached down and troubled the deep waters of their very souls. 

The pioneers were not supermen and superwomen. They were just like you and me. How often did they wonder if they could go on? They must have asked themselves over and again, “Can I do what I have been asked to do?”

But they pressed on. In faith, one step at a time, they pressed on. They trusted in God and His divine and merciful plan. And they left a legacy that will inspire and strengthen generations to come."


{Richard G. Scott}
"I have never complained because I know it was His will. I have never asked why but rather what is it that He wants me to learn from this experience. I believe that is a good way to face the unpleasant things in our lives, not complaining but thanking the Lord for the trust He places in us when He gives us the opportunity to overcome difficulties.We can do the best we can, but the final outcome is up to Him. We should never complain, when we are living worthily, about what happens in our lives."


{Dieter F. Uchdorft}

"Choose to be grateful, no matter what."

{Mosiah 24:15}
“And now it came to pass that the burdens which were laid upon Alma and his brethren were made light; yea, the Lord did strengthen them that they could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord."

"If you are on the right path, it will always be uphill. The Lord is anxious to lead us to the safety of higher ground." {President Henry B. Eyring}

If for a while the harder you try, the harder it gets, take heart. So it has been with the best people who ever lived." {Elder Jeffery R. Holland}

There have also been many Ensign talks I've read. I want to keep track of the things that have provided me with comfort here so I can refer back to them.

Pregnancy at 26 Weeks

I have decided that I don't like being pregnant. It isn't easy on my body and the amount of worry this time around drives me crazy. I have decided my pregnancies are anything but "normal."

• I get progesterone shots every week starting at 16 weeks to help decrease my chances of preterm labor.
• I am Rh Negative so I have to have my blood drawn and a special shot taken at 28 weeks and again after baby is born to prevent my body from fighting the baby off as a foreign object and so it doesn't figure future babies we may have.
• I have to have ultrasounds regularly to check my cervical length to check for preterm labor and incompetent cervix.
• First child came 3 months early, this child is going to be born with a heart defect.
• I can't have cute baby pictures taken of my babies when born or take them home to show off to the world.
• I have to have c-sections to have babies.

I am sure I could think of more if I thought long enough. Nevertheless, it is what it is. I LOVE feeling baby move and I love seeing my belly grow, but that's about it. I have tailbone pain from about month three and it only gets worse and worse. Rolling over at night is painful. So, some currents of my pregnancy:

• Baby moving lots! Feeling him at bottom left of stomach and top right by my ribs so he's getting big.
• I waddle like a duck due to my tailbone pain.
• Stretchmarks are showing up more and more. Something difficult for me since I didn't get with Cooper, but also because I am already self conscious about my body. Trying to embrace the change! Just grateful I can have kids.
• Cravings: Carrot cake and Sonic ice water, lots of ice!
• Weight: Gained 10 pounds since my first appointment. I weight more than I have ever weighed. I am hoping it comes off easily because I was already overweight.
• Symptoms: Indigestion in the middle of the night, tailbone pain, very frequent visits to the bathroom, need for daily naps, lack of energy during the day.
• What I miss: being able to do things! I just have no energy or strength.
• What I'm looking forward to: only 10-11 more weeks and no more shots! I also get to meet my adorable baby! 
• Emotions: Most days I'm doing well. I have my moments of uncertainty and weakness. I am trying to stay positive. Very grateful for priesthood blessings.
• Cervix: Doctor says no signs of an incompetent cervix.

I know after our little one gets here that life is going to be hectic and emotional. I am excited to get the ball rolling though. The waiting is very hard since there is nothing we can do right now. And the pain and discomfort I am ready to be done with. So, 10-11 more weeks to go. Praying this little one stays in there that long. So far, it's looking good!

I am so grateful to have the gospel in my life. It has brought me much comfort over the past few weeks. I love being a member of this church.